What normally happens in a Jupiter Hell run is that I'll get enough levels deep for the enemy to finally graduate beyond fun-sized health bars, eventually get overwhelmed by one ambush too many, die, and then feel terribly discouraged, because now I have to trudge through all the boring, easy, early levels again, and randomly rearranging the specific layout of samey corridors doesn't add enough variety to be more worth my time than quitting the game and rearranging my desktop icons. what the fuck does it gain, actually? What does Doom have left without the violent, in-your-face, ballsack-distressing catharsis?It's not exactly survival-focused, because I leave most levels fucking ankle-deep in the ammo and guns all the enemies drop that I couldn't squeeze into the child-sized fanny pack my dude brought along. So, translating Doom to top-down, grid-based action certainly loses in exciting violent spectacle what it gains in. The experience of Jupiter Hell is creeping your way through dingy hallways until an enemy shows up, then you endeavor to inch your way into cover before they can eat your health away, then you sit there, pressing the "Fire" key until they and the nineteen friends they have arranged behind them in single-file are all dead. It also can't be controlled with anything but keyboard, but for me, that's the point where "deliberate retro homage" crosses the line into "just couldn't be arsed to add controller support". Jupiter Hell is, in brief, a love letter to retro PC gaming of that era, which should be obvious from the way it does its entire GUI ASCII-style, with a big, chunky font that looks like it's trying to beat my eyeballs to death with pixels. In other words, it's Doom, but it's played in a top-down grid-based format that it refers to as "turn-based", but in the sense of those old Ultima games where the monsters were properly-raised good little boys who politely waited for you to do something before they all simultaneously did their next thing. See, you play as a burly space marine who comes to a tech base deep in the solar system's flyover country to find it taken over by demons and zombies, and must battle their way through the depths of Hell one fricasseed demonic ballsack at a time. Stop TikTokking your amazed reaction, and I will explain how. But here's the twist, you procrastinating twat: it's not a first-person shooter, but it is undeniably a Doom clone. Now, as I'm sure I've said before, I'm tragically decrepit enough to remember that period in the 90's when we called every first-person shooter a Doom clone, and Jupiter Hell made me very nostalgic, because it's a Doom clone. But let's see out another droughty summer with one last indie double bill, focusing on that one special genre that is to indie games what intestinal parasites are to inexpensive Mexican food: roguelites, starting with Jupiter Hell. Yay! Now there's only disease, poverty, climate disaster, and political disenfranchisement to sort out, and we can start focusing on the real issues, like developing a controller for a Nintendo console that doesn't give me old man wrist. Hooray! Drought season's almost over! Woo! We got through another one without self-harming or playing too much weeb shit, but I repeat myself. Thanks to our fans' continuing support, The Escapist is on track for our best year yet. New merch is also now available for Adventure is Nigh and Zero Punctuation and more. We've also added three new perks for our $5 tier, including a 50% discount on merch via our Teespring shop, a new piece of bonus content called " Escapist Highlights", featuring the best moments from our streams each month, and a new members-only livestream, The State of The Escapist, where you get a quarterly update on how the site is doing from our editor-in-chief. Plus, you get a bunch of perks like ad-free viewing via The Escapist+ on our main website, early access on YouTube via YouTube Memberships, and bonus content like our monthly Ask the Creators video series, where we answer your burning questions. Your support allows us to continue making the content we want instead of chasing algorithms or the latest trends. This month, we're asking for your support through our premium programs via The Escapist+ and YouTube Memberships. This week on Zero Punctuation, Yahtzee reviews Dreamscaper and Jupiter Hell.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Details
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |